Articles from The Onion

Sumerians Look On In Confusion As God Creates World | The Onion - America's Finest News Source

Members of the earth's earliest known civilization, the Sumerians, looked on in shock and confusion some 6,000 years ago as God, the Lord Almighty, created Heaven and Earth.


Dinosaurs Sadly Extinct Before Invention Of Bazooka | The Onion - America's Finest News Source

"Over the years, we've learned a great deal about their physiology, their dietary habits, and even their migratory patterns," Diffey said. "Unfortunately, however, nothing in the fossil record can reveal what it would be like to blow apart the massive front leg of a charging diplodocus and then watch it crash violently to the ground, sending a spray of dirt and dinosaur blood several stories into the air."

Geeks are Sexy | The Sorcerer’s Apprentice: Nicolas Cage Goes Hadouken!

The Sorcerer’s Apprentice: Nicolas Cage Goes Hadouken!

From Minnie to Mickey (and all they did was turn off a gene) - Science, News - The Independent

From Minnie to Mickey (and all they did was turn off a gene) - Science, News - The Independent

Scientists have discovered that switching off a single gene, FoxL2, causes the ovary cells of adult mice to spontaneously develop into testosterone-producing cells. They speculate that research like this might one day may eliminate the need for surgical removal of the ovaries in gender reassignment treatment; however, much work is needed to determine if the results are applicable to humans.

Nanotech ink turns paper into batteries - News - Windows for Devices

Nanotech ink turns paper into batteries - News - Windows for Devices

Researchers at Stanford University have created a battery by baking paper onto which has been applied an ink containing a mixture of carbon nanotubes and silver nanowires. The battery can be crumpled or even soaked in acidic or basic solutions without performance degradation, and can be charged and discharged an order of magnitude more often than lithium batteries. The battery also discharges quickly so the technology could also be used to make cheap supercapacitors.

City of Ottawa - City of Ottawa's Approved Sledding Hills

City of Ottawa - City of Ottawa's Approved Sledding Hills

For those looking to do some sledding in Ottawa, the link is a list of hills that are now open for use, as well as a description of the hill.